tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post297637411891299596..comments2023-04-07T08:34:58.486-07:00Comments on Is it better than a brownie?: I'll go firstJenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07522748534258154186noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-84732893054634747162016-11-02T18:31:02.419-07:002016-11-02T18:31:02.419-07:00I agree, Anonymous. Until everyone realizes how ho...I agree, Anonymous. Until everyone realizes how horribly normal this all is, it won't stop. And to get there, we have to talk about it. I'm sorry, too, that you have those experiences, but please know you're not alone. We are in this together.Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07522748534258154186noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-70451362106509686942016-10-28T00:10:47.235-07:002016-10-28T00:10:47.235-07:00Thank you all for sharing your experiences. It is ...Thank you all for sharing your experiences. It is somehow comforting to know we are not alone, and sickening at the same time. I shudder to think at making a list, too long and frightening to have it all in one place staring back at me. I have told my husband about a few of my assault and harassment experiences. He was shocked, even more so when I told him all of my friends have similar stories. I have no answers on how to protect women and children from these things, however talking about them openly surely can only help. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-90927844987698117492016-10-27T12:14:05.826-07:002016-10-27T12:14:05.826-07:00This was incredibly thought provoking. While I hav...This was incredibly thought provoking. While I have been so unbelievably fortunate to have escaped actual sexual assault (something that should really just count as normal instead of fortunate) I realized that I can look back and count up instances of harassment in excruciating detail. On top of that I can add in times when other people (mostly men) have expected me to be unable to do something because I am a woman. These aren't things that sink below the surface of your memory and fade away, they become parts of your psyche that shape who you are and how you behave. While I am sorry beyond words that these things happened to you and countless other women, I want to thank you for writing them out and making me think a little deeper. EHhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06909470986107523160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-78588489589770452652016-10-22T23:24:02.873-07:002016-10-22T23:24:02.873-07:00Well done, Brownie. I put a few stories on my blog...Well done, Brownie. I put a few stories on my blog a while back, but I can't even do a comprehensive list because it would make me so mad to write it all out. I'm mad enough already! (And sorry about your thyroid!)Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02598392419852251555noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-61009466037041316822016-10-22T10:53:25.607-07:002016-10-22T10:53:25.607-07:00To my anonymous colleague, I hope that your daught...To my anonymous colleague, I hope that your daughter will bring you great joy and that she will grow up in a world that we are making better for her and that when she is as old as I am, this kind of thing will be history and people will say "Did men ever really act like that? That's so hard to believe!" And thank you for sharing your stories.Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07522748534258154186noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-49119692197271746052016-10-22T10:25:38.381-07:002016-10-22T10:25:38.381-07:00Oh, I could write a list. And it would start with ...Oh, I could write a list. And it would start with being abused at age 4 by the son of a colleague of my dad's, who my mom had hired as a babysitter. And it would go on to include the "nice guy" at college who wouldn't take no for an answer. And the colleague twice my age who propositioned me when his wife was out of town -- I was 27, same age as his daughter. Can't count the catcalls, the grabbing, and the insults. How can I be both too good to resist and too hideous to be seen? Oh right, that's just how it is to be a woman. More recently, when I found out I was pregnant with a daughter, I cried. Because I will have to try to help her protect herself from the things that can happen. And even so, they probably will happen. One day I asked my husband if at any time in his life he'd ever wondered what it was like to be a girl or wanted to be a girl. No. How many times have I wondered how much easier it would have been to have been born a man? Many. Don't get me wrong, I am a proud member of my sex. But the road is harder and the older I get the more angry I get that this is how it is. Thank you for sharing your list. It both soothes and pains me to see these stories and realize that I am not alone. We are not alone, we are legion, so why the FUCK is this still the way it is?Anonymous colleaguehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09764091426089699370noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-24485120973171461552016-10-22T09:18:55.375-07:002016-10-22T09:18:55.375-07:00Denice, I'm so sorry. I'm glad you're ...Denice, I'm so sorry. I'm glad you're ok and can laugh about it. But holy crap! That guy had no right to do what he did.Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07522748534258154186noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2590464407293090719.post-69702281672181116922016-10-22T07:24:16.470-07:002016-10-22T07:24:16.470-07:00I have a "funny" story I like to tell fr...I have a "funny" story I like to tell from when I lived in South Korea about a water delivery man who arrived at my apartment one day when I didn't happen to have any cash on hand. He didn't speak English, and I tried to explain in my poor Korean that I didn't have any cash. After trying to make heads and tails of my explanation, he made a thoughtful face and said in Korean, "No money?" followed by "Sexy okay?" I was so flustered by then that I left him standing in the open doorway of my apartment and ran downstairs to the ATM on the first floor. When I got back upstairs he was sitting on my bed unbuttoning his shirt. I thrust the money in his face and chased him out of my apartment. When I tell the story we all laugh at the insane idea that this man thought I was going to surrender my virtue in lieu of a $5 jug of filtered water. It's easy to call the story funny now, but in that moment, as soon as I'd locked him on the other side of the door, I curled up on the floor and cried, and I felt sick and dirty for days afterwards. It was a long time before I told anyone what had happened, because I felt so stupid for leaving a man who had just propositioned me standing alone in my unlocked apartment. Of course there are other stories I could tell. We all have a little clutch of them. But for some reason, this is the one that shook me up the most, even though there was never any physical contact.Denicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04068119137567359353noreply@blogger.com