No, there is too much. Let me sum up.

So a world-wide pandemic that has killed over 1 million people is not better than a brownie, but you knew that already. There is too much to explain what you don't know, so let me sum up. Child one is married and graduated with an MPA. Child 2 and Child 3 are both studying different kinds of music at the same university. Husband and I spent a year+ studying Mandarin in Virginia via Zoom. And now we are in quarantine in Beijing where we should be studying Mandarin, but it is a holiday week so I am binge watching Netflix shows I downloaded before we came and playing on my Nintendo Switch. Husband is slowly going crazy because he has no one to talk to but me and I don't talk to him because I am busy playing Animal Crossing New Horizons like my life depends on it. And it does! Or at least my 5 star Island rating does and my neighbors have come to expect expensive presents and I still haven't learned how to catch scorpions without getting stung a million times. They team up on you and when you finally catch one, you still get stung!
But I digress.

You are now possibly wondering how long one can play ACNH without stopping and the answer is 11+ hours if you have a charger. Listen, it is quarantine in China and I had no internet access until yesterday and also I made 580,000 bells in ACNH two days ago by selling scorpions, so don't judge me. But I have been doing other things as well, like blindly ordering groceries via an app. Yes, I know I am supposed to be able to read Chinese, but although I know the characters for terrorist and violent crimes, the Department hasn't thought it important for me to learn the words for detergent or lemon juice, so I order by picture and sometimes am surprised. For example, whatever you think is spinach in China is definitely not spinach. And also lemon juice and dish soap look a lot alike. You cannot use dish soap as a substitute for lemons, if you are wondering. But I finally did find a photo of a lemon and I clicked on it and the next day I had two lemons delivered and something that looks like pork which I thought was chicken but is still edible. So success!

If you are wondering how I am adapting to life without the children and The Dog at home, the answer is terribly. I miss the children. I only know how to cook for 5 people so we have a LOT of surprise pork leftovers. And my kitchen floor is an unholy mess because The Dog isn't here to clean up spills. Yes, The Dog is just fine. She now lives with Child 1 and Son-in-law and is happy as a clam trying to steal their food and sleep in their bed. 

See? She is just fine and I don't miss her at all. Nope. I don't dream about her and I never mistake a pillow on the floor for her and I didn't even cry at all when I said good-bye to her. Nope. Not crying now either. That's just my eyes watering from too much lemon scented soap. 

I know, I know your final question is how is it learning Mandarin via Zoom? And the answer is definitely better than a brownie because you can cheat! Don't judge! I am too old to learn how to read again and if I didn't cheat, I wouldn't remember a single thing. Well technically, I'm not remembering so much as looking stealthily at my notes which are off camera. But you try learning to write Chinese characters in your old age and see how well you do! I can now write 100+ characters, so only 49,900 to go! Sigh. Maybe someday I'll actually be able to do it all without cheating, but I'm not holding my breath.