Pageantry

Today was pretty productive and I can tell because I am completely exhausted. First we left at 8, that's am, to pick up Child 3 who was at a slumber party with a friend from our last post at their house which is 45 minutes away. Then we rushed her back to play practice and made a grocery run. Then I finally went to Michaels and managed to replace some of the broken ornaments. Then I rushed back to pick up Child 3 from the practice and ran some errands on the way home.

And then we made apple crisp--gluten free of course, and rushed off to the church Christmas party to not eat lasagna and watch Child 3 perform in the Christmas pageant. I should mention that although everyone else was eating lasagna, Stevie and I had arranged to share food, so she brought delicious gluten-free skillet lasagna, and I provided the dessert which we did not put on the dessert table which was a good thing because if we had, we wouldn't have gotten any to eat. Then we discovered there were other gluten-free families doing the same thing and we traded some of our dessert with them for some of theirs which Stevie ate and said was delicious. (It all had chocolate.)

But anyway, back to the play. You have not lived as a parent until you've put bunny ears on a three year old and pushed him out onto a stage in front of hundreds of people with the instructions not to cry or wiggle. I'm not sure if there were bunnies at the manger in Bethlehem, but that 3 year old rabbit was cute. These were not our kids, but  you get the idea. I think the girl on the right is a donkey, but is the other one a duck?

Child 3 was a "Believer" and had some sort of brown fringey costume and ribbons in her hair. I'm not sure where the ribbons came in Birth of Jesus, but those were our instructions, so we ribboned her up. She looked adorable.  So then we came home and put up some more Christmas lights and now the teenagers are having a fire pit party in the back yard. That was their reward for attending the pageant without whining. I'm exhausted.

This hat is not better than a brownie.

I guess based on the model, that I am not the intended target, but then again, I'm not sure how many 20somethings wearing strapless fur dresses would go for a chimney hat with Santa legs either. Honestly, who thinks up these things and how can they possibly make any money?

I told her so!

Child 1 got into college. I knew she would. One of her schools has already responded, even though the deadline was mere days ago. Not only did they call and leave her a message telling her she got in, they have already sent two e-mails. So congrats, my sweet girl! I told you you'd get in. Moms know these things.

So back to last night, we caught the end of the Sound of Music thing on NBC and it is the only time I will ever yell at the TV for Capt. Von Trapp to just marry the baroness already and forget the boring nanny. It's safe to say that I didn't like it, and given the comments I saw on facebook, neither did much of America. It's not so much that Carrie Underwood isn't Julie Andrews, because nobody else will ever be Julie Andrews, or that you can't get the Austrian Alps onto a sound stage. I mean, how do you make this a backdrop?

No, it's that Carrie Underwood's last name is entirely descriptive of her acting ability which was extremely wooden and way understated which is to say so understated that you couldn't tell that she was acting because it sounded like she was just reading off the script for the first time. I would feel sorry for her, but she probably made a boatload of money for all that non-acting.

These macaroons might not be better than a brownie, but I think they're worth a shot.

Festive and delicious and gluten free. Oh, and not chocolate. I really miss chocolate. And brownies. Did I mention that I like brownies?

I dreamed a dream

Tonight was the high school band concert so of course I have a headache which is doing it's best to explode into a migraine but I'm fighting it. Child 2 was awesome,  but someone needs to tell me why We had to listen to some kid singing and watch a ballerina at a band concert!  So very annoying and made the concert way too long.

So I'm going to bed. Listening to Child 2 play music from Les Mis was better than a brownie. But the headache isn't. Good night.

Foiled again

I didn't get to go shopping tonight. I forgot that Husband had a thing and needed the car, and since the children had the other one, I was left home alone with the dog. So I finished reading the new Bridget Jones book which was OK, but predictable and I was very, very sad that Helen Fielding has lost all her imagination. There were some funny parts, mostly involving Bridget's daughter who is 5 and hilarious, but the rest of it was very disappointing. It makes me sad because I have a special place in my heart for Bridget. I mean, what girl hasn't hidden under her blanket with a tub of Ben & Jerry's at least once? Or maybe twice. OK, a lot, but that was before the whole chocolate/wheat/and now dairy problem.

I read Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason in 2001 a couple of months after 9/11. I love reading. I read all the time, but I couldn't after that horrible day. Nothing held my interest and I thought nothing would ever be the same again. Then I discovered Bridget and I read it and I laughed out loud for the first time in months because the part in the book where she interviews Colin Firth about the scene in Pride and Prejudice where he comes out of the pond is probably one of the funniest things ever written. Yep. Loved it. So very much. This new book is not like that.

This Christmas apparel is not better than a brownie.

The children and I saw this when we were out shopping and thought it was probably about the worst idea ever. I told Child 3 I would pay to see her wear it and she said why would she want to turn her hair into a nose. She has a point. Still, if anyone wants to try it, please, please send me a picture.

Because I don't feel like it

I am exhausted. I've been in my pajamas since 7:30, but I can't convince my family to let me go to bed. First there was dinner to be cooked and then there were dishes to be done and homework to be helped and hair curlers to be put in. Plus I had to tell Husband to stop diagnosing himself on the internet and make an appointment to see a doctor which if he actually has the thing he diagnosed himself with, he had better do soon or he'll be in a wheelchair. (He doesn't have it. Nobody every has what they self diagnose or else Child 3 really did have Toxic Shock Syndrome last year and I currently have pancreatic cancer. She didn't and I don't, so he is not likely to either.)

So the upshot is I didn't make it to World Market today. Maybe tomorrow because the children will all be off at an activity which Child 3 is driving them to and other people are chaperoning, so if I can ditch Husband, I can go get some ornaments! Child 1 called them "orgamets" when she was little and I still miss that.

Child 2 would like me to apologize for my bad blogging behavior and let you all know that she has taken nutrition classes and she knows what healthy food is. The fact that she didn't put any on the list on her own is beside the point. So, Child 2, I am sorry for implying that you like unhealthy food. However, I have to point out that there is nothing wrong with liking unhealthy food. I, myself, am very fond of brownies and really, really miss them on days like this. so here is a picture of scrumptious brownies because this is as close as I can get to them without feeling sick. I used to make awesome peppermint frosted brownies. Nothing is better than that. Not a thing, at least that I can think of today.

Only a little smashed?!

Apparently if a Christmas tree falls in the middle of the night and no one hears it, the ornaments are still smashed. We woke up to find the Christmas tree completely toppled over. I shrieked when I saw it because who wouldn't be upset to find their beautiful 8 foot tree on the ground and half of the ornaments smashed. When I yelled, The Dog immediately flattened her ears and slunk off into a corner, so I'm pretty sure I know who the culprit is. She likes to drink the water out of the tree stand, so I can just see her knocking it over. Husband says she is a small dog and the tree probably fell over from exhaustion from having to hold up all those ornaments. To which I say hmph! You decorate your own tree then next year, Mr. Scrooge! But he at least helped me put it back up. We placed it in a bigger stand and are hoping it's more stable. We'll see, I guess.

So I went to Target tonight to buy a few ornaments to replace the ones which got smashed which of course were all my favorites including the Vera Bradley glass painted one and two of the manger scenes. And the ornaments at Target were all awful. I mean, I love Kermit and Animal as much as the next person, and maybe more, but no way will a hot pink Animal ornament go on my lovely cranberry  and gold tree.

And frankly, that doesn't even look like Animal. It's some sort of evil pink Grover in a Santa hat. It's all wrong. And believe me when I say this is the best of what was there. So tomorrow I'm going to Michaels to see if they can help. And sometime this week I will make it out to World Market to replace the ones I got from there.

So then we came home and Child 2 broke out in hives again. I know! This is the child that is supposed to not be a problem and there she is breaking out in hives all over her face. So I made her wash her pillow and she is starting a journal about what she ate and where she went when she breaks out because this is the third time in about a month. Speaking of Child 2 still, and how she is not supposed to be difficult, she is still obviously a child because I told her to make a list of things we needed at the grocery store and this is what was on it when I got to the store.

1. Milk
2. Chocolate chip mint ice-cream
3. caramel sauce
4. gluten free cereal
5. rice pudding
6. candy

I'm the one who made her add the milk and cereal. We're going to have a little talk about nutrition and "needs" and exactly why an all sugar diet is not a good idea, especially when we are already hyper about the holidays.

On a happier note, the annual Christmas Island crab migration has begun and it is better than a brownie.

Someday I hope to get to see this in person, but that would require more luck with bidding than I've had in the Department so far. But go little crabs! And watch out for cars.

But that's supposed to by MY thing

You may remember that I am a little addicted to Christmas decorations. You see, in a former life, OK, not really a former life but before Child 2 was born, I was a floral designer in a craft store and I made wreaths, lots and lots of wreaths, for fall, and Halloween, and Christmas, and Hanukkah  and Valentine's Day, and along with the job came a discount on everything in the store, so I bought lots and lots of Christmas decorations, and I've kept adding over the years, and um, now I think we might just have too many. Maybe. It's hard to tell because we haven't got them all up yet. I promise, it's much more attractive than those people who decorate like someone vomited Christmas all over the places. There is a color scheme, and it is all artfully placed. But there is a lot of it and I'm thinking that at some point, we might need to cull it a little bit. But not yet, I'm not ready yet. This would be way, way too many decorations. Is that a swan with the wise men? Or are those elves, and why is th manger bigger than the church and why is poor Mrs. Santa exiled to the back of the porch away from everyone all by her lonesome? Poor Mrs. Claus always being left behind and having to wear that stupid bun.

Thankfully, the children are old enough that I can say, just start putting it all up, and they go for it. They did almost all of the tree decorating tonight, except the ribbon and some of the poinsettias, because even though the tree is supposed to be my thing, now that I know for certain I am allergic to it, I can tell that I react worse when I touch it. My face is all red and swollen, I can't stop sneezing, and I have a rash on my hands--all from decorating the tree. I must have had this going on for years, but I never connected it with the tree. But I can't give up the tree. I already gave up chocolate and wheat and the. tree. is. staying. period. However, I think I can bribe people to water it and then take it down later. Or at least I can threaten to never do a real tree again. That might just work because it's something I'm clearly considering.

Baby Pandas are better than brownies, and this one is so scrumptious, you could just eat her up.

Figuratively, that is. It is illegal to eat pandas and I would never, ever do that. But the National Zoo finally gave her a name since she has reached 100 days old and it is Bao Bao, or 宝宝, which means treasure. So welcome, little Treasure! You are as precious as your name implies.